Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
