I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Randomize
