We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
