i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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