what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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