this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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