i just google imaged poop.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
