I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize
