i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
no you cant smoke seaweed
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
