The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
