How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
