My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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