He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
My pussy is not your playground.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
you made out with another girl for some wings
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
