Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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