i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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