Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
