I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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