Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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