she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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