We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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