you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
