Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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