Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
