I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
