i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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