I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
