yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
