If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
