3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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