Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize