Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
