So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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