god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
