i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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