I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
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