he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
