That's intense
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
