I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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