I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
You're a waste of cheezeits
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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