She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Randomize
