so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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