I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
