he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
