More tranny stories later!
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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