just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
