All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
