Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
