she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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