Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize