We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
