You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize